Close to the beginning, there was nothing. Then there was a little
something. But the Evil Black Hole got pissed and destroyed it. All was
still for a trillion eternities...
Then the Beautiful White Hole gave birth to various naked (and hot)
things that distracted the Evil Black Hole.
AND THE UNIVERSE, AS WE SORT OF KNOW IT, WAS BORN.
Then the Evil Black Hole (really pissed) created The Phantom, Skull
Moon, and other nasty things to plug up the Beautiful White Hole so
that he could get some sleep - he had a killer hangover from trying to
score with those stuck-up, naked things.
The Beautiful White Hole responded in turn by creating more hot naked
things, which perpetuated the spawning of more nasty things that tried
to tie them up and do weird things to them.
AND THUS BEGAN THE ETERNAL STRUGGLE BETWEEN THE MOSTLY GOOD (BUT KIND
OF STUCK UP) AND THE VERY, VERY, PROFOUNDLY EVIL.